Wednesday, November 2, 2011
More Mental Health
Discussion with psychiatrist today (this conversation has been slightly edited for my own comfort):
Doctor: (looking at my form) I see you're having a lot of trauma in your personal life right now.
Me: You think?
Doctor: Where are your parents moving?
Me: Near Hilton Head, South Carolina.
Doctor: Why are they moving?
Me: Well, they say the weather, but it's the same weather here today as it is there. I don't know. It's upsetting. I love my parents, but this is making me nuts. I know that's where they want to be and that it will be better for my father's business, but it's going to be really hard on me, physically speaking.
Doctor: I can imagine. You know, I have a little cottage in Shepherdstown for rent. It's really cute - one bedroom in an upstairs loft, a jacuzzi tub downstairs. Nobody knows how old it is. My wife won't let me sell it. Could you seduce them into renting the cottage from me?
Me: They insist on moving. They already bought a house.
Doctor: With your mom's illness, there might be a contractual way for them to get out of the closing on the house.
Me: You don't understand. They want to move. I even had a huge fight with my dad about it and they're determined to move south.
Doctor: That kind of puts you in a bind with your fibromyalgia. How far away is it?
Me: (gritting my teeth) Ten hours.
Doctor: That's kind of far for you to travel. I don't think you should be traveling that far.
Me: Uh, yeah. I don't really go more than two hours in any direction. Plus, if there's a crisis and I have to be there for a long period of time, I will be ten hours away from my kids.
Doctor: That must be upsetting. Oh. I see your father in law passed away. I'm sorry.
Me: Yeah, that was traumatic. It was very unexpected.
Doctor: Your life is kind of in turmoil. I see it also says that you are having weight gain and abdominal discomfort. How's your appetite?
Me: I'm starving. All the time.
Doctor: How can you be starving when you have severe abdominal discomfort?
Me: The pain is below my stomach. It makes no sense, I know. Maybe the Lyrica?
Doctor: That's possible. You might have to back off the dosage.
Me: Except it's helping the fibro. Can I rent your cottage? I could escape from my kids.
Doctor: Sure. I'll rent it to you, if you want it. Is the zoloft helping?
Me: The zoloft is allowing me to cope. I actually cut back on the anti-anxiety med.
Doctor: I would think you would need that right now.
Me: Well, I didn't tell you when I cut the dosage back the last time I was here so I would have the extra pill for the really bad days.
Doctor: That's reasonable. We won't change the prescription.
Doctor: You look much better than the last time I saw you. I think this is a better weight for you.
Me: I don't care what the scale says, as long as it doesn't hurt.
Doctor: How much do you weigh?
Doctor: Well, you're much less "drawn" than you were the last time I saw you.
Me: That's amazing, considering I feel like my life is falling apart.
Doctor: Well, your life is very difficult right now, but you're completely stable. Here's a refill on your sleep med and I'll see you in three months. Exercise as much as you can. You know, needlework is exercise.
Me: (Slightly hysterical laugh) I cross stitch until my hand hurts.
Doctor: There you go.
Med Student: You're really bipolar?
Me: Oh yes. Dr. J thinks I should be in his theater troupe.
Med Student: That's remarkable.
Me: Well, I'm pretty dramatic. Theater is a hobby I should consider.
Doctor: We have some great productions coming up. There's a one man Christmas Carol.
Me: Um, how is that possible?
Doctor: He plays all the parts.
Me: Okay....maybe acting isn't for me. That just sounds weird.
Doctor: Well, you could do anything you wanted, once your life settles down. Look at Patty Duke.
Me: Oh, Kay Jamison is my idol.
Doctor: Isn't she in Baltimore now?
Me: Somewhere on the east coast, last I read. She was in California and then moved here. But that was awhile ago.
Med Student: Who is Kay Jamison?
Me: If you're interested in bipolar, she wrote An Unquiet Mind. Best book on bipolar ever. She's my idol.
Doctor: I'll see you in three months. Hang in there.
Me: I appreciate that.
(Completely medicated for your protection, but still impulsive as hell and prone to bursting into tears at a moment's notice.)