Thursday, August 25, 2011

Writer's Block, Oh My!

Courtesy Google Images

Things to do when I have writer's block:

  1. Call my mother and talk to her until her ear is bleeding and she's begging my dad to shut his finger in the car door just so she can get off the phone
  2. Sit on Facebook; hit refresh every 30 seconds
  3. Make snarky comments on other people's blogs
  4. Do laundry - why do we always have laundry???
  5. Ponder why life is so unfair
  6. Ponder why I'm so negative; take benzos and anti-depressants
  7. Bother Justin while he's working
  8. Take video of the dog freaking out to post to YouTube; learn how to post to YouTube
  9. Go through my kids' rooms to find (insert whatever they stole from me here)
  10. Stalk Stephen King's fan page to see if I can figure out whether he's in Florida or Maine; send letter from "his biggest fan" asking why he hasn't come out with another 1100 page book yet
  11. Think about how much my chronic pain hurts; take painkillers
  12. Play words with friends (Really addictive, if your friends are responding)
  13. Put away the laundry; find new laundry; repeat
  14. Ask Justin what he wants for dinner (always entertaining because we never know what we want for dinner and he's working; see above)
  15. Write words on the bananas for Justin and/or the boys to find later
  16. Remove clothes from closet that no longer fit me; go online shopping because I have no clothes
  17. Put sunglasses on the cat who is too lazy and fat to fight me; take pictures; post to Facebook
  18. Eat junk food; remove new clothes from closet; go online shopping again for bigger clothes
  19. Check mail for new People magazine; live vicariously through celebrities; wonder why Kim Kardashian doesn't give all of her wedding money to charitable causes
  20. Make lunch; trip over the dog; drop lunch all over floor; allow dog to eat lunch; mop floor; repeat
  21. Get mail; open credit card statement; begin returning new clothes
  22. Marvel over people who are able to hold down a real job and get paid for it
  23. Go to the Apple website and drool on my computer over the iPad2; reach for credit card; remember bad experience with credit card people above and put away credit card
  24. Take a nap; wonder why I can't sleep at night; and 
  25. Watch Coyote Ugly for the 1207th time on cable. 
What do you do when you are uninspired?



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